Revisit

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I remember you, all the time
When the days are shapeless
Rain falling lonely on a little puddle
A man walking home to his bed
I remember how you said
Nothing.
Nothing when I loved you, quiet
Not a word when I stroked your hair
I remember everything you didn't say or do
I remember everything else about you
I remember you because you're not there.
The rain falls harder and the puddle overspills
I never said I loved you, and I never will
Perhaps I didn't
Perhaps you know that too
I remember when you left one day
Smiling, "See you soon." 

Fluid

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Today I don’t need to write
I am happy

I will
Rest my chubby fingers
Against the cool iron bars
Before my white painted windows
Rest my sad shaped shoulder
Against a wall which homes me
Rest myself

The rain sings so beautifully
It is beyond all writing
I am beyond all words

I can be a moldy green patch of earth
Who said I’m a girl?
My feet isn’t skin
They’re shells
And they’re beautiful

The rain falls like it knows
How to empty me
I am happy as I know
I am not only me

I am the rain
The iron bars
The window and the wall
I have never lived or never died
But I am alive and I’m singing

Today I don’t need to write
Because today I can feel
Today I can be
Today I can sing
What else do I need?

Under construction

The sand bag of my body
Leaks through tears on the sides
When I cry at night
Stone chips rest on my chest
They collect one by one
Clink, clink, clink
Seconds tick inside aloud

My sack is a shroud
That I sewed for myself
Threads made out of
Agonising hate
I’m cemented to the floor,
I need some help
I want to get back up.

Should I wait for the bulldozer to arrive
On some time even gloomier than this?
I’m perhaps already laughing at myself
On the other side of the pain
In moments of bliss and disbelief.
I don’t need help, please.

Raindrops

Monsoon breeds rainy eves
Outside I hear, raindrops scream
Like lovers with fiery passion
With almost a violent motion
They rush to kiss the earth.
Their watery bodies
Shaped like exclamation marks
Strike the ground.

There’s no other sound
I’d rather listen to.
Oh how I enjoy
To drown my thoughts
More often than not
With steady noise.

Hit me with the rain
Do away with words
I’m so tired of your questions
Knocking on my door
Over and over again
Drench me in rain!

My murky mind is paused
Oh, I am so lost.

Rain

I hate it
When the breeze is pregnant with rain
My nostrils taking in
The maddening petrichor
And suddenly my head
Which I always hold high
Needs to rest on someone’s shoulders.

Monsoons get you drunk
Even the dry ones
Where you spend hours thinking about the rain
Complaining about the humid stifling
And even a slight shower of rain
Can make your mind long for a dance.

Do the water drops in the downpour
Attract my tears?
A cohesive force?
I still don’t know
How the raindrops streaming down the window pane
Bring teardrops to my eyes.

Raindrops stream down the barren land of skin.

The nature outside invokes the nature inside me
The stream flows
To where
To whom
Who knows.

I hate it
When nature sings her sad song
And dances to its spitter spatter beats
And all I can be
Is a needy little fool.